Dear Motivation…

Dear Motivation,

I know I haven’t always appreciated you like I should over the years.  There have been times when I barely needed you, and I treated you like you weren’t important to me.  I minimized how much you were there for me, and sometimes I pretended like you didn’t even exist.  I know when I said things like, “I have no motivation,” it must have really hurt you.  I’m sorry for that.

You and will power seem to be at odds with each other, and it may seem like I love him more than you.  I talk about him like he’s some amazing gift.  “My will power got me through that,” and, “Thank God for my strong will.”  But I almost never have nice things to say about you.  I talk about you like you are never enough, never worthy.  “I just don’t have enough motivation to get this done.  I wish I had more motivation.”  I never really considered how that must make you feel.

So now you and my other very important love, who rarely gets any attention at all (good or bad) sustained attention, have gone on strike, and without the two of you I’m lost.  At first, it seemed okay.  You have left for short times before, but never for very long, and you usually leave a note.  Not this time.  The longer you’ve been gone, the more I need you.  Will power seems a little strung out, and he’s really been failing on the “refuse the ice cream and cake” side of business.  But I only have a limited amount of resources, and with you and sustained attention in Cabo he’s trying to do it all.  I’m tired, I’m stressed, I can’t focus, I’m starving, I want to nap all the time, and I can’t seem to get anything done.  I just look at lists of things I have to do and sigh, wishing you were here to help me with it all.  I tried more coffee, but not even that is helping anymore.  I guess it’s true, you don’t know what you’ve got ’till it’s gone.

So this is my plea to you and sustained attention.  I know I’ve taken you for granted and treated you like the ugly step-sisters, but I need you.  I’m lost without you two.  We are the best when we all work together, as a family.  I can’t promise I will never take you for granted again, I am only human, but I certainly will try.  Please come back.  I miss you, and I’ll do whatever you want me to, to make this right.

Oh, a cookie…

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About brookeg20

I'm a 32 year old female. I'm originally from upstate NY, but have been living in central FL for the past five years. I'm in my third year of a doctorate program in Psychology. I started running about six years ago, and I am currently training for my first half-marathon.
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